A convergence of events of the past week have left me adrift and not really knowing what day it is anymore. I’ve been trying to call a doctor’s office for the past two days and it not registering that its the weekend and the office isn’t open.
With my son on summer vacation from school, I don’t have that rigid schedule anymore to keep me grounded. My husband has an unusual work schedule that gives him 4-days off every other weekend. This is his extended weekend and this past Monday was a holiday also, so he was off then as well. I’ve thought it was Sunday for the past five days.
Since I’m not up at 6 a.m. every morning anymore, I’ve been waking up naturally between 8-8:30 a.m. And its been a nice relaxing wake-up instead of getting jolted out of REM by the blare of the alarm. The drawback is my body-clock is losing two hours of consciousness so while I FEEL like its just past lunch, its actually late afternoon and I should have already started preparing dinner. I think we’ve been the sole financial support of the local pizza place this week and I’m now on a first name basis with all the delivery drivers.
There’s also the disconcerting feeling that there’s something I should be doing, but I can’t remember what it is. This is the fifth year of summer vacation, but I’ve never had this kind of restlessness before. I’m pretty sure my not having a schedule is the underlying cause of my spring cleaning frenzy.
The biggest problem with having this constant underlying vibration of unease is when I do try to relax, I can’t focus on my activity or can’t enjoy what I’m doing. I read two paragraphs and have to put my e-reader down. I crochet twenty stitches, then put it down. Shut off a game or the TV after only a few minutes. I’m spending more time jumping between hobbies than I am actually doing them. I never thought I’d say this, but I can’t wait for summer vacation to be over.